Roller Coaster

So……………last night was a roller coaster for us.  I logged on to the states website for waiting children and noticed that the sibling group we had fallen in love with was gone.  I refreshed the page over and over hoping that it was some computer error.  Tears fell.  (that is putting in mildly) 🙂

I know that it is a GREAT thing that they are no longer on the website.  It means they found their home!  I am overjoyed in that.  It is an answer to prayer for us.  I just was very sad that God closed that door for us personally.  I have developed a bond with them.  Just with their picture.  Sounds nuts, huh???  There was something in their faces that pulled me to them over and over again.  We JUST requested info on them this week………………..now they are gone.  It was such a weird feeling to praise God for them and weep for myself all at the same time.  Help me Lord—-we are only one week into this waiting game.  Don’t get me wrong–we  both know that God’s timing is perfect.  It is.  We also have all the time in the world.  I just didn’t know that each child would mean this much. …….

Bryan’s last word to me last night was “God closed this door because another door is opening.”  I clung on to that truth as I went to sleep last night.  Then this morning when I stumbled into the kitchen to get my coffee………….there was their picture on the fridge.  They are so precious!!   I have a new found joy this morning.  Their picture will stay on my fridge and I will continue to pray for them and for their new parents.

So now I pray for the other 3 kids that we requested more info about and for another 2 that we just found out about this week………….and for kids that have not been revealed to us yet.  One good thing about this emotional journey is that I find myself on my knees at every turn.  Thanks for reading………………….off to drink my coffee and pray before my 5 blessings wake up.  Have a blessed Friday and weekend!!  Love you!

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